How to stop a social media trigger in its tracks?
I sat in darkness, clutching my deceptively large nose bridge.
It felt like people online were playing with my emotions.
I was trying to avoid fireballs being thrown at me — and failing!
I felt like a lion on the prowl, who had just found his next meal.
This was me on 27th March 2023 — about 9 days after my 33rd birthday.
Today when I look back at that journal entry, I can see those were all the signs of anxiety. I was triggered.
4 months later, I now get triggered less often than I used to. In this journey, I’ve learned ways to recover and stop myself from spiraling down the rabbit hole of self-flagellating talk.
Here are some tips, from my personal experience, that you can try to implement if you get triggered on social media:
Think about how you may be perceived by your dream clients if it was the ONLY thing they ever saw/read about you.
You may say good things 80% of the time and argue like a Karen 20% of the time — but people are not going to be interested in working with you if that one nasty comment was the only thing they ever saw/read about you.
You would lose good work, good clients, and most importantly — you could lose good friendships!
You don’t always have to say something to impress people. But if you remind yourself that you get only 1 chance to make an impact IN PUBLIC, you suddenly start thinking about the effect of saying something BEFORE blurting it out!
Ask yourself “Will this matter at the end of my day?”
You know, try to see if will this even register in your mind as a significant event once your day has ended. Or if you will just go back to working on your things once the whole anxiety cloud flies away in the next hour.
Sometimes, it may just be a minor annoyance or an irritating moment in the day.
This helps you relax, dissipate your current hyperfocused energy, and refocus it on your daily priorities. This is how you reframe what that heavy public argument actually means for you in the context of your current day.
Try to think about the problem differently
If you’re in a particularly rancid mood and you just want to “prove how right I am”:
- think about the topic instead of the person — and do it leisurely!
- think about the consequences of other people’s poor choices — but don’t say it to them online!
- talk about your points as if they are addressed to everyone and not targeted at that one person — your focus will no longer be so narrow!
- think/talk about what you like about their point of view, then share where exactly you differ from them and why.
Think about how you formed such strong beliefs in what you are saying
This helps you examine your own perspective, your own story — and gradually you also begin to understand the other person’s perspective. If you still don’t fully understand their perspective, you could ask for specific examples like this:
- Could you elaborate on <a specific point> in a bit more detail?
- <state the experience from which you draw your perspective>. I wonder if you have a different story about this?
I hope this helps!
Focus image credit: Newslaundry
Hola mi amigos!
My name is Navin Israni. I am a quad-lingual late-diagnosed Autistic adult from Western India. Professionally, I am a writer and a marketer. I’ve recently restarted my hobby blog on Medium and I’m trying to reach 1000 new people by the end of 2023. If you really loved this post, please do add a comment and a clap so Medium knows. If you think this post will help someone, please share it with your network. If you wish to talk to me about my professional services or if you want to hire me, you can find me on LinkedIn.
